Ill Fitting Shoes

Happy New Year

2012-01-01T06:39:00.001+01:00

Happy New Year Every One!

I'm happy to say that 2011, though it was hard, was a good year.
In work I accomplished a lot, I became the manager of the coffee shop I worked at, hosted two art shows, a failed fantasy fest and multiple music events. I stood up for my beliefs and left that job standing only my principles. I began working for a graphic design company and I now enjoy a great design job building websites.

In love I can't say I had much, haha. I went on my first date ever at 21 years old to a great guy, but nothing came of our date but friendship.
I yearned a lot for a relationship, and I'm still yearning.

In art, I got better, made money off of my art, and used my talents to get a career started in graphic arts.

In literature I still haven't finished my book, but I read a lot of books.

I travled little, I lost a lot, but I grew immensely in 2011.

I spent this new years with my parents, we watched a lot of movies, I played WoW, RPed with some friends and drew.
I was a little sad I didn't get to do what I had wanted for New Years, but I savored what I did do and enjoyed my self greatly.

So next year is now. Wow, where did the year go!?
Well, let's see. What do I want to see happen next year?

I'd like to be in a serious relationship- headed towards marriage.

I'd like to be in school, no more of this working with out a college degree.

I'd like to travel more, maybe visit spain again, or go to southern ireland. Hopefully see Japan.

I'd like to work on my art, and draw a hell of a lot more.

I'd like to own my own house.

I'd like to have a dog.

I'd like to have my car payed off. haha

That's about all I can think of. I think it's all realistic, so let's see it happen.

I'm ready for 2012 to be the best year of my life, so c'mon guys, let's get on with it.

You Have All the Weapons You Need...

2011-11-23T05:15:00.005+01:00

You can deny angels exist, Convince ourselves they can't be real. But they show up anyway, at strange places and at strange times. They can speak through any character we can imagine. They'll shout through demons if they have to. Daring us, challenging us to fight.

"

So tonight I watched Sucker Punch, I saw it once before in theaters and I'm sure I've mentioned it to most of you.
I have to say; I'm not sure if it's my neurosis or the real deal, but, this movie inspires me.
It's not so much the story lines as it is the quotes.
And I like kick ass action flicks.

So tonight I just wanted to share some of my favorite quotes from the film.

For those who fight for it, life has a flavor the sheltered will never know.

If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.

Your mind can set you free. To reach your own paradise just let go

.

For me these quotes are golden. I often find my mind get's in the way of my heart, or my ambition.
Doubt is the weapon and logic, and for people with big dreams 'logic' is often an enemy created in our minds to say that we can't do it.
These quotes remind me that it's me who stands in my own way.
I'm not afraid of the devil, or the boogie man, my arch enemy is often times the same mind that grants me my biggest inspirations.

You are afraid. Don’t be. You have all the weapons you need.

What you are imagining right now. You control this world.

To reach your own paradise. Just let go.

I've been given all the tools I need to reach my dreams. My destiny lies within me, and I've been equipped to accomplish it.

I think most of us expect an angel in white light to appear and give us divine inspiration as to how or what we're supposed to do with our lives.
I think God makes it a lot more simple than that.

In the move Baby Doll is forced to dance, her dance is a fight for her own survival. The first dance starts out with her royally taking a beating, but she realizes something midway through the battle, if she possesses the weapons to fight then she must possess the know how to use them.
That is the biggest turning point in the movie, Baby Doll turns from a victim to a victor in a split second and the best part is it's a natural thing. The audience isn't showered in glitter and spot lights to show how she's transformed they simple see that she starts to fight.

When I saw this it made me realize that I need to stop waiting for that divine moment when I suddenly am blessed with the knowledge I need to complete the task, I just need to take what I know and do it.

"Who honors those we love or the very life we live? Who sends monsters to kill us, and at the same time, sings that will never die? Who teaches us whats real, and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live, and what we’ll die to defend? Who trains us, and who holds the key to set us free? It’s you. You have all the weapons you need. Now fight!"

I think that pretty much sums up the point of this blog, and what the movie meant for me.
It means, in less flowery- much abridged- english; Get out of your own way, and do something.

Xena Made it Look So Easy

2011-09-29T04:19:00.003+02:00

I guess I'll just start out by saying no one makes sense any more... but maybe it's just me?
Where ever I go I see people living their normal Western lives and I just don't get it any more... but maybe I do?

The best way I can describe these feelings is painting in this light; As a kid I was very imaginative, my sister and I had a made up world of tree sprites, and animal royalty and all around magic and sunshine. It was like living in a secret garden, and that's very much how my relationship with God was for a long time.
But like all heroines from stories that deal with magic and fairies I grew restless and went out into the world.

I became Xena in a lot of ways, I was warrior woman with a spit fire attitude when wound up and an even keel when left to my own devices. I loved the way my life had become, and the way it looked like it was heading.
I left my safe quaint delicate little garden and roamed through fields of glory making big battle plans and working to secure a future as glorious as the grand visions my wanderings gave me.

Let me clarify that I am still that person, a rough and tough warrior woman, sword in hand and and dreams in heart but something has happened as of late.
I've been invited into a lot of people's 'gardens'. Their private lives and worship sessions and here is the part where my childhood obsession with Xena didn't prepare me for.

You see in the television show Xena traveled around kicking butt and taking names, but every once in a while she'd visit some mystic temple or lavish garden and she fit in there just as did on the battlefield.
In the real world- or the semi-parable world- it doesn't work that way.
I end up being a lumbering warrior trampling on flowers and pulling up the shrubs by the roots.
I don't mean to shake values and challenge core beliefs, but you really didn't have to worry about offending people out in the field like you do in the garden.

Home has been very much like a big open plain littered with gardens that I've visited.
Churches I've attended, Ministries I've been apart of even friends that I keep are all these gardens. While I am able to live in them comfortably I just don't fit in with them. There are always those nagging little things that make you bristle under the armor your wearing.
It's like they're from the same culture but a different tribe.

This is more of a get this weird feeling of rogue-ness off of my chest kind of blog, but I think it can be applied to a lot of people who have experienced being apart of a culture that has lived out of the status quo.
I don't just mean people in ministry I mean people have held the dying, loved the unloveable, listened to unspeakable confessions with out batting an eye and extended grace to every one they met with out questioning that persons faith or motives.
I don't meet those people often, and I don't get every one else in the world who can't do those things any more.

The Bible says "The weapons of my warfare are not carnal" and I'm starting to get that. We're not fighting a war in the traditional sense. We're taking ground empathy and grace not excluding our selves and judging others. Each battle is won by becoming part of a culture and enforcing the positive strengths of that culture rather than over taking a culture and punishing all of it's wrong doings.

So I've decided that I hate the metaphorical gardens, where they hear the stories of people doing something out side of their four walls/paradigm/every day norm and associate it with what they can understand rather than seeing it for what it is.
Ministry is about winning the lost, it's about being Christ to a hurting world.

The only time Jesus quoted scripture was to those who used scripture as a weapon, the rest of the time he just quoted his father.
That's what we do out side of gardens, we live our lives by what God says, not by what someone holier-than-thou thinks is right. And out side of gardens we get stuff done.

I'm not bashing traditional church, or any particular group, I'm just calling my self out a little bit. Garden's are great to rest in, but there no place for a warrior to live.
I'll stop tearing up your shrubberies now, I'm picking up my sword and I'm going to push out of these gates.
In the words of Xena...

Nothing too Spiritual Today

2011-07-26T04:12:00.003+02:00

Can I just say I love Alexi Wasser. But I don't really love her, she says things that disgust me but at same time she says other things that are so deep in a shallow way that you can't help but find your self drawn in.
Her blog http://imboycrazy.com/ is not a family friendly place, but it does have no-nonsense advice for women living in an urban world.
You just have to pick through it, like these quotes:

6. Sometimes I have a problem; I’m more concerned with casting a spell on a guy and collecting his love before I decide if I even like him.

8. Why is it that the guy you want to text you doesn’t, but the dude you don’t give a shit about won’t stop? BUT, if the guy you actually liked texted you as much as the guy you don’t like, wouldn’t you think he was a pussy and be turned off? Probably, right?

11. What am i looking for? what do i ultimately want? I want my future husband (and by husband, I probably just mean ‘uuber serious relationship or father of my child’) to know BETTER than me! i want him to make me feel safe. i want him to be my best friend. i want him to ‘get’ me. to get ‘it’. i want him to be handsome, tall, sexy, funny, smart, great in bed, a gentleman, loyal, and successful. i want to be fascinated by him. i want to respect him and believe in what he does. and vice versa.

2. what are you doing? you’re wasting your life away! and you’re even more guilty because you know exactly what you want to do and you know exactly what you have to do to achieve your goals, but you’re running in the OPPOSITE direction! Wake up!

Just a few snippet's of what I find interesting about this brazen woman from L.A.
I'd like to have coffee with her one day and pick her brain apart, because for all her funny social commentaries and shallow wisdom she seems like she's hurting, but maybe that's just her big blue eyes.

Integration isn't so great.

2011-07-13T06:38:00.005+02:00

This past week I had the unique opportunity to work at a missions training camp for an organization called the World Race.
This group sends missionary teams to 11 countries in 11 months to do extreme missions and humanitarian work.
While I've never been on the World Race and do not intend to go I've known a lot of Racers from my time at G42, and from the fact that my parents were life coaches for many of the racers.
A group of Racers that were helping at as well with this camp have just gotten off the field, and a few have just returned from G42 and I noticed a lot of conversations about re-integration into American culture. This stirred up a lot of old feelings from when i first returned from G42 and some conversations that I had with other racers/G42 alumni about coming back home. It also inspired me to write this blog detailing some of the symptoms of Integration and some antidotes.

The first of these is Exclusivity:
You just got back from the most amazing experience of your life with some of the most amazing people you've ever met, the majority of the American population isn't going to get what you've just experienced, nor are they going to get how you've changed. But don't worry it's not the end of the world. It's also not the first time some one has experienced something like this.
I found when I got home from Spain I found that I had a lot more in common with World Racers coming off the field than either of us realized. We were both used to seeing the miraculous move of God on a daily basis, and we both lived in a close community, and by close I mean close quarters, close friendships and often enough time shared close calls. I also found that we weren't the only two groups to experience this, I met a man in Nashville last year who had returned from military service in the middle east and as we got to talking we both realized we could relate to each other about our home coming experiences.
This can go to show you that your not the only one going through this, you aren't the only one that understands how you feel and there are lots of people who get you. It's okay to talk it out with some one who wasn't apart of your group, you never know who might be able to relate to you.

The next is Business:
Just because you've been gone for six months to a year doesn't mean you have to see every friend and distant relative in the first two weeks you get back. Take that nap you haven't been able to sneak in in your time away. Remember that book you started but weren't able to finish? Now may be a god time to start that.
A lot of times when you get home you feel restless, like you should be doing something all the time, but it's okay to take a deep breath and do something completely unrelated to missions for a while.

Another symptom is Abandonment:
This one comes about in two ways.
The first, the one I experienced is by feeling abandoned.
For me (just because of geographic location) I felt like every one had forgotten about me. I watched for months as every one was posting pictures on facebook where they were seeing one another again and reconnecting and I was stuck in the eastern corner of the states suffering out the summer with out any contact from my G42 classmates. Of course I tried my best to hide it and make my skype calls and claim that everything was fine, but I was suffering from serious abandonment issues.
But here is the good part, this doesn't last forever. Just like the sun doesn't stop shining when you close your eyes for a moment your friends haven't forgotten you just because you're not first person they see every morning. They are probably remembering the great times they had with you, but their busy living life. The best thing to do may be to turn off facebook and spend some time with the one who put you together with these friends in the first place. Jesus is the best comfort for abandonment, he'll bring the right people into your path at the right times and he knows when you need to stand on your own two feet.

The second abandonment symptom, which I know less about, is abandoning others.
Some times when you arrive home you're going to feel disconnected from every one else because your not with every one all the time any more. For this form of abandonment I would suggest just the opposite of the first antidote.
Turn of Facebook and connect, even though it may be as awkward as when you first met your community living partners, but, try to reconnect with them on the home front again. And as always spend time with Jesus, like I said above, he'll let you know who to talk to, and when to pull back.

One that I still have issues with is Over-Relation and Experience Regurgitation:
You have just experienced something incredible and now you want to tell every one about it.
Since I'm still dealing with this one, I'll leave this one short- you don't have to tell everyone about your trip/experience/life story. Just because you can relate doesn't mean you should regurgitate your entire story on them.

I can't think of any more right now, but I hope this kind of helped sort some things out. I know that it helped me to go over what I had experienced and keep in check what I might still be going through.

Protecting Me

2011-04-30T06:52:00.002+02:00

Recently my job has been consuming my whole life. I haven't meant for it to, it's just that every one else that worked there has had other things come up, school, other jobs ect. and it's left me taking care of a lot of things on my own.
I've pulled a lot of twelve hour shifts, taken a lot of slack about what the owner had or hadn't brought in, and generally just ran the business the best I could with what was given to me.

Recently thing have come about with my job that caused a lot of drama and ended up causing the owner to sign the business over to the land lords.
And to be honest I was a little bit pissed, but I could live with it, it meant I was going to get the help I needed and I could make some sacrifices.
The land lords asked to meet with me today to discuss the terms of my employment with them rather than my previous boss.

Last night I had been angry because of the way I had been previously treated by the land lords and now they wanted to 'reason with me'. I don't consider my self a difficult person to get on with, but they treated me as if I was unwilling to work with them prior to my previous boss signing the store over to them. Which wasn't true. I was loyal to by previous employer because he was my employer. It never meant that I was fully filled in on any situations between him and the land lords, or that I even sided with him about any arguments between he and the land lords. It meant that I wasn't going to get involved with something that didn't directly concern me.
But this morning when I woke up I prayed about it, I really really sought the Lord about what to say, how to approach it and I gave him these stipulations.
"God I'll stay and work for them, even if they take away my management position, but I can't afford a pay cut, you gave me the car I wanted for a price I could afford with the pay I was receiving and you won't take it away from me now. You gave me a dream for a ministry that would take trips regularly over to japan and I'd be able to pay part of my own way with the money I had previously been making, and you won't take that away from me." "Give me the right words to say to him, the right questions to ask."
And God replied. "Red Hot Heart, Ice Cold Brain."
It was a saying that Andrew Shearman, one of my teachers in Spain (who is mega anointed and wise by the way) said often. It means to go into situations with your heart full of passion but your brain working with complete logic and not running away with all those passionate feelings. It was always great advice but today I was going to put it into practice.
So I told my self, and I told God, I would stay unless they reduced my pay down to Seven dollars, and they refused to move on passed the previous owners short comings.

When I got to the store and had my meeting my stipulations were met with flying colors. No matter how many times I told the land lord I wasn't informed of decisions made between he and the previous owner he kept trying to tell me about how he had 'pulled the wool over our eyes' and how 'he wasn't the man we thought he was'. I stuck to my guns, I refused to let him talk about this man with out him being there to defend himself, and that it was not relevant to our agreement about my employment. I was willing to forget my previous boss ever owned that store and work solely for him (at least for a little while any way) but he refused to let me work for him unless I let him talk about the previous owner.

The land lord I should point out is a Christian, he is a minister and he is very dogmatic, king james only and the like. I think he's experiencing GOd in his own way and I expected him to respect the fact that I was trying to honor him, honor my previous boss and honor my self by moving passed that and starting fresh. But he didn't, infact he pulled out his big guns "Your Boss told lies about you."
I froze here, because honestly I didn't know if my previous boss would have or not, I would have hoped he hadn't but I wasn't sure. My first instinct was to hear what he had to say, ask what my previous boss had said. But God spoke to me then.
"Is defending your self worth loosing your honor?" And again I heard something Andrew said to us in Class.
"One day your going to have a choice on whether you're going to be morally bankrupt and financially sound or stand firm and let God take care of you. "
And my choice was made clear then. I cut off his story there.
I told him as long as he knew they were lies, I didn't need to know what was said, and that we could move passed them and forgive and forget. Then I told him that what I wanted to know that would decide my staying on with them or not was "Will I still be the manager, and will I still receive the same pay?"
And I can quote exactly what he said to me.
"I would love to have given you that pay, but honestly I can't give you $9 an hour if you we can't talk about the past, and I would have loved to have started you at $7 an hour and given you raises, but obviously we can't communicate."
I knew then I had to go. I couldn't afford to stay there much less could I morally afford to stay there.
I refused to stay under some one who felt that moving forward meant dwelling on the past.
So I thanked him for his time and told him that I appreciated him taking time out to talk to me and that he considered me for staying on.
I told him that I was sorry he felt we couldn't see eye to eye but I felt like God was calling me to a place of honor and that I didn't feel right in my spirit about talking about my previous boss with out him being there to defend himself or to agree with the land lord.
Before I could leave the land lord said something to me that made it hurt personally.
He said to me;
"I've been a Christian longer than you, and I've had many more years walking close with the Lord than you have, what you think is honoring him isn't, and I'm sorry you couldn't see that."
It took everything in me not to shout at him. But I had to turn on that ice cold brain.
"I have been a Christian since I was 5 years old, I've graduated from a Christian Leadership Academy, I'm starting a ministry and I've been part of ministry since before I could walk. God speaks to me as a prophet and as a friend and I'm sorry that where he's calling me isn't where you are comfortable with." then I shook his hand and thanked him again for his time, I told him that this conversation didn't effect my view of the coffee shop, his personal business and that I was glad that my sister was still employed with him and that this didn't effect her job. After i let go of his hand I turned around and left.

I sat in my car broken, sobbing and crying out to God. Why did doing what he told me hurt so bad!? Why did it have to be so hard!?
But it was a lesson I had to learn, one I'm still sorting through and sifting through and working on.
"Be devoted to one another and out do one another in showing honor"
-Romans 12:10
My Honor is worth more than my reputation. God is looking out for me, and a job where I would have to lower the standard of honor God has set for me isn't going to fulfill me.
I'm sorry I had to quit my job, that I had to leave the coffee shop, I enjoyed my work and my customers, and I still harbor no ill will or hard feelings against the book store and it's owners the land lord, but I refuse to work where my walk with God and my ability to hear his call is questioned because of who my previous employer was.

Let's Play Pretend

2011-04-28T03:21:00.003+02:00

Recently a guy I know has been pursuing me... blatantly.
He's a smart, funny, and has a great sense of style. We have the same humor, we're into the same things and I can see my self becoming very good friends with him. He's like the male me.
But, because he's the first guy I've ever really connected with that is pursuing me he puts these thoughts in to my head.
"What if he's it"
"What if he's not?"
"He's not this, or that"
"But he is that and this"

The truth is as far as I know he's not a man of God. He's a leader, he's a articulate out going fire starter, but he lacks the flint that is the groundedness of Christ.

I saw this tonight video tonight, and it made me re-realize something. I'm not looking for almost, I'm looking all together of Christ.

I don't know if he's it, or not, and I'm going to continue our friendship, but I'm not worried about it any more. God is the author of time, so waiting isn't really a big deal. Because no mater how long or short I have to wait, it's going to be right on time.

Fantasy Fest? LAME!

2011-03-28T05:17:00.001+02:00

As some of you may know the reason I haven't been active lately is because we were having a big event at work called Fantasy Fest.
Fantasy Fest was a two day Sci Fi and Fantasy Festival in which we were hosting a charity raffle and fun raiser for a non profit organization called Project Ignite, the fund raiser was to help them send a group to Ukraine to work with Orphanages in that country.
We were going to have the 501st out to help us promote, some artist there and a costume contest.
It wasn't going to be a big event, but it was going to be fun!
Also the book store connected to the coffee shop I manage was having one of their biggest sales of the year the same day. Sounds like a no loose situation right?
WRONG.

To start off this tale we must start at the beginning. Back the second weekend in January we had a small comic signing event with a local comic book author, we got to tossing around ideas with him about fantasy and scifi things that would go over well for our venue and the idea for a Fantasy Fest came up.
At first I was a bit wary, us a small coffee shop, put on an event that some might confuse with a minor con? No gracias, I thought. But the owner of my store talked me into it.
He didn't know I was a huge nerd, so he thought it would have been a stretch for me to get some nerdy people to the store- I wish I'd let him think that.
Instead I rose to the challenge.

I hooked up with a friend of mine who is part of the 501st to see how I could get them out there to promote the event, and what charities would be good to work with.
I should have known this thing was doomed to fail when I tried hooking up with the battered women's shelter. The place is a great non profit, which great people and a great cause- their interns just don't know how to return phone calls.
After three weeks of phone tag I was approached by Project Ignite with their non profit, and I jumped on the task because they had all their info ready.
It was all set, I was ready to go to the 501st. By this time it was mid February.
Now any one in the nerd community that has an eye for costuming will tell you the 501st is where it's at. Not only are they a set ready costume guild their sponsored by Lucas Film it self!
And lucky me, I had an in. My friend in the 501st was on the ball ready to be the rock star of the whole show.
He was working to get the event on the forums, and I was submitting by the 'request and event' form and then it was time to sit back wait for the members to roll on in and come by.

Now I could finally commit to working on that charity raffle, getting prizes and working on promoting that portion of the event.
Now I won't pretend I was every day at every store and on the phone all the time, I am currently working on getting my GED (I'm not a drop out, it's a long story, yes I already complete highschool I just don't have a diploma) which is taking longer than I wanted, I'm also the manager of the store, and in charge of not only hiring new staff, but I am the sole person training them. Then to top it all off I'm working on starting my own humanitarian project, (causeandeffectjapan.org) so needless to say I'm very busy and I haven't had a single days rest in over a month.
And a week before I had to hand that over to the founders of Project Ignite.

Now here comes the fun part of the story, the super duper fun bit.
A week before the event my friend in the 501st calls me- and tells me he's moved to Texas. It was a quick move and he was very good to still be working on the event while being a dive instructor teaching 4 classes a week and doing 30 hours of office work, but he wanted to know how many people had signed on for Fantasy Fest out of the 501st.
And then I panicked.
You mean all this time people hadn't been talking with him about Fantasy Fest!? It wasn't generating any attention at all!?
The gnawing feeling that this event wasn't going to work out began to sink in.

All last week I've been making calls, emailing people and texting my little heart out to get any one from the 501st to help us promote this event. Mean while the owners of the book store we are connected to begin to raise HELL, mother loving HELL with us about everything in our store, the way we're set up, our paint, our selection- the fact that we're not buying pastries from the SAME SUPPLIER AS THE BAKERY IN THE SAME STRIP WE ARE IN!
And who get's to hear this ear full on nonsense? Me, if not from them then a retelling of it from the owner.

So now I have:
no prizes for the raffle,
no one showing up to promote the event,
and 2 angry land lords who want to shut us down
Sounds like a recipe for a great event right? =_=

Well Friday night rolls around. The day before the event and only one 501st guy is coming and he's not even wearing his own armor. He's having to borrow my friends. After staying up until 2am trying to convince people to come I gave up, I had to get up at 8 the next morning any way to start getting ready for the event.
Also did I mention this was supposed to be an outdoor event? I woke up saturday to a horrible rain storm- like you wouldn't believe.

Saturday morning the guy borrowing my armor is the only guy from the 501st there. He was a nice guy but you could tell he didn't want to be there. I had to pin him into the armor because it was made for some one 8inches shorter than he was.
He left about 3 hours later, not that I blame him but before we even announced the raffle.
I could see it on every ones faces then, but I had to force my self to remain optimistic- This day was a bust.
Not only was the book store making my artist move their work 'out of view' but they set up a food stand with hot dogs right out side of our door! Because of the rain people kept bringing their outside food and drink into our store and not buying anything and taking up tables making our customers stand.
It was like every one was wanting us to fail!

Sunday was our close out day, and my some miracle my friend calls me and tells me to text another guy from the 501st. This kept me up until 2:30 am me trying to get him there and he (a married man by the way) flirting his way around the subject.
Sunday morning I wasn't even sure if he was coming. I told him the night before that we would be slow until about 3 or 4 and he showed up any way at noon.
You could tell all morning he was pissed, he was stiff he wasn't talkative and he was short with everything I said or did.
He left at 2 on the dot.
And even though we had mildly pleasant good byes and 'keep me updated of future events' he proceeds my friend to send my friend a text about how unhappy he was with my event. How it was a 'non event' and that 'I was a nice girl, but had no idea what I was doing' and not to bother calling him with favors like that again, he was only going to show up for 'board posted events'.
I was humiliated.

Like I said around 3 we packed the place out, and the event did it's job.
It told people about our store, it got the information about project ignite into the right hands.
But still with all the obstacles I faced I can't help but feel I failed.
I'm not looking for a "Oh Hannah, your doing your best" kind of patronizing comment.
I'm to exhausted to care, I know I did my best, but I can't help but feel like it wasn't good enough.
It pisses me off and it makes me hate to even think of dealing with this kind of event again.
We're supposed to have another fantasy fest in fall, but I'm not even sure I want to try after today.

Now Presenting...

2011-03-07T23:50:00.001+01:00

Dear Friends, Family, Supporters and every one in between,
Most of you know that for a long time I’ve had a heart for Japan, and most of you have encouraged me to follow my heart to where ever God lead me and to do what ever God has lead me to do.
Many of you were shocked when I said I wanted to help Suicide victims and all of you prayed for me to follow God’s heart.

In January of last year many of you helped support me in making the first step to following the path God has lead for me. I set out for G42 Leadership Academy with a place in mind and a challenge for both my self and a self-issued one for God.
“You’ve told me where, you’ve told me why, but I’m ready for the HOW”
Like always God rose to that challenge in my time in Mijas Spain I began to dream big dreams about how I could help.
My ultimate goal became about opening a discipleship house under the guise of a rehabilitation home.
I want to take in suicide victims (People who may be considering or have attempted suicide) in Japan and teach them their self worth and empower them to operate as the mighty men and women they were born to be!
But to do this one needs funds and a platform and some sort of credibility.
While I have a long term goal of becoming a Cultural Anthropologist and going in through the government to help in Japan that still leaves at least four or five years while I’m in school that I’m not proactively doing something for my cause.
Thus I created Cause and Effect.

Cause and Effect is a grass roots humanitarian project that will lead teams to Japan to teach the practice of hope to the suicidal Japanese.
Through trust building, empowerment and community out reach Cause and Effect hopes to establish it’s self as a beacon of proactive change, deterring suicide and spreading hope.

While I was in Spain I dreamed and planned and prepared and when I got home I continued to dream and plan and prepare and for a while nothing seemed to happen.
Feeling at my wits end and desperate I began ask God again. “WHEN?”
And for a while I heard nothing.
I decided to just rest, letting God deal with this in his timing.
That’s when something amazing happened.
God brought my launch pad to me.
Some of you may know that while I fight crime and spread hope by night in the day I have a secret identity as a manager of a coffee shop. It’s not a glamorous job but it’s fun and it gives me a chance to meet and converse with lots of interesting people. Among those interesting people are two God sends, Josh and Elizabeth.
Josh and Elizabeth are the senior ministers of a group called Project Ignite.
Project Ignite started out a pro-life ministry and evolved into just what its name implies a fire-starting ignition, breathing life into all the ministries it comes in contact with. These guys are the real deal, between pro-life education, orphan ministry and campus crusades these guys are dynamic go getters and true Godly leaders, which is quite a feat since these ‘senior ministers’ are only nineteen year old college students.
One night when the shop was having a slow evening I got the chance to share my heart with Josh and Elizabeth about Cause and Effect, about how I felt this was a big part of my calling and I was able to share my disappointment that things were going so slow.
It was good that God had brought me some peers to vent to but the real miracle didn’t start until I got home that night.
I logged onto FaceBook to find Josh had sent me a message telling me that Project Ignite wanted to help me get the Cause and Effect website up so that I could focus more on getting to Japan than the menial things like paying for a website to get the word out.
Shocked as I was I accepted their offer and began to go through the process with them of building this website and in turn building my excitement back up for Cause and Effect and getting on with what God has been calling me to do.

So I unveil to you the Cause and Effect website.
http://causeandeffectjapan.org
Getting this website up is just the beginning the launch so to speak of big things for Cause and Effect.
I’m planning to go to Japan in November to meet with contacts and will be raising funds for that starting this month.
The total price for one person to go to Japan will be $2200, this includes airfare and hotel.
In the 9 days I plan on being in Japan I plan on meeting with local Churches and outreach programs as a good will mission. I want to extend Cause and Effect to them to help with what they need be it painting a kid’s church or actually helping out suicidal youth. I want to work in community and lead teams to be part of the community to develop trust and dependability so that when Cause and Effect begins our own work we won’t just be the outsiders who want to change the culture and community but we will be part of the community helping the community.

In closing I suppose I should mention that Cause and Effect will be accepting donations through Family Ministries for now and all donations are tax deductible.
I will also thank you all for praying for me, supporting and lifting me up in my journey thus far but hold on tight, because I’m just getting started.
Much Love,
Hannah Day

If I Keep Banging My Head Against It...

2011-02-03T06:36:00.002+01:00

Recently I've been having this feeling, that I'm a burden on the people around me, that I'm not going any where and every one is looking at me and wondering what all that big talk I said was about, and where it's going.
For awhile all I could do was hold it in, and I kept feeling like every one was giving me the same speech, why aren't you in school, why don't you have a second job, what are you doing with your life, are you still going to Japan, when are you going, why don't you have the money,and the list goes on and on.
I started to take the speeches and put them on my self.
Why wasn't I in school? Why Couldn't I find a second job? Where was my life going? Was I even going to be able to get to Japan? When? In another year? In another 3 years!? How was I going to get the money?
The more I took those burdens on me the more I strove to prove them wrong, I worked harder at my current job, I looked at tickets to Japan, I downloaded the application to Harvard.
But it felt like I was pushing against a stone wall and nothing I could do would move it, and the speeches, and the burdens and the stress just closed in around me and I couldn't get past this wall.

I'll stop here to say that all the speeches were made in love, and that the people who talked to me about school didn't also talk to me about Japan or a job but all of these things happened at once.

Now onto the good part. I've been trying to challenge my self, not to focus on the speeches and only focus on the wall, let down my stress and baggage and go on with my moving this wall.
But it wasn't moving, and I was desperate, clawing at the damnable thing like a frantic person trying to escape from a fire.
And then something amazing happened.
Tonight at work I got held over for an hour and a half, I was tired and I was ready to go and I was irritated because people wouldn't leave.
There were two of our regular customers that were also in the store getting ready to go and we just struck up a conversation about his business folder, then all of a sudden Cause and Effect came up.
Ideas starting coming to both of the customers and they suddenly knew people who would be interested in my cause and people who could help me mobilize it.
Then when I got home I saw on one of their face book statuses they posted the link to the Cause and Effect Face Book page endorsing it and telling people about my vision. And sudden I felt it shift, my wall moved.

I'm not saying everything was magically cleared and I'm not feeling like my chipper normal motivated self again, not just yet.
But that shift gave me hope that there is another side to this wall, and I'm going to break that freakin' thing down!!

Art Show Number 2

2010-12-19T04:48:00.000+01:00

Okay so It's not very professional to update on every artshow I have here on Blogger but this is only number two so I think I'm still allowed to do this. lol

So I answered an add on Craigslist asking for local artist to show art at a concert at the Masquerade in Atlanta. So I of course replied to it.
And got a reply back!
Come to find out the band was Epica and I was really excited to be working with them.
While I was in Dallas I worked on my pieces "Mistress of the Twilight" for the show, and got it put on a 11X17 print, framed and it was ready to go.

So the night of the concert finally came and things were going smoothly, got to my sisters work to pick her up in record time but when we got back to the car it wouldn't shift out of park.
I panicked, I freaked even. I was going to be late to my own show!
I called my mom and asked her to come and drop us off at the venue.
So I here I am, part of the show for a METAL CONCERT being dropped off my my MOM.
Not that my mom isn't cool, as mom's go I think mine might get an award for coolness. But still it's the principle of the rebel spirit of metal music and all that. lol
And I was late, about an hour, but it was okay.
I showed up and got to walk passed security with out a ticket like some hotshot.
We stood by the table and I was a bit embarrassed I didn't bring anything to draw or paint with. Thankfully the other artist there had a sketch pad I could borrow.
So I sketched (he got to keep them, dernit, I liked those two pics) and listened to a few local bands. They were okay, but they took FOREVER to play, and because my Mom was driving us, we had to leave early.
I didn't get to see but a few songs of Epica though I did get to meet the band.
And they hit on my sister.
DARN IT! Why does she have all the luck? lol

Gardening, among other things

2010-11-17T13:47:00.003+01:00

My parents have been pastoring a church out of their hope for the past eight years. It's a great place and I've really grown in this environment where every one has something to say. Where we've all been activated to speak and prophesy because we've all seen the loving heart of God.
On occasion my parents have asked me to speak while they were out of town but I've always been nervous and haven't really known what to say.
Tonight I'll be leading the 'service' and well I think this time I'm prepared.
Thanks to an early start at work I've had some time with God, just me him and the espresso machine. It's really given me some time to think about everything he's been laying on my heart and just let him know how thankful I am for the opportunities he's given me lately.
So I wanted to share a bit what God and I were talking about this morning.

Am I a gardener, or a garden?
At different times in peoples lives they are gardens, being worked on, worked in, and often worked out.
But also the Bible tells us Jesus is the gardener in our lives, the bible also tells us we are co-heirs with Christ and are to share in his laboring (IE be Jesus to every one we meet). So this left me with the question, When do I get to be the gardener?
When do I stop being constantly worked on and start showing others the potential they have?
Paul tells us in Corinthians that salvation is a continual work in us and that we must die daily to the human things. The things that make us separate gardeners from gardens.
And in that adamic human nature I asked: "When do I stop dyeing and when do I get to live again?"

I remember in Spain one of my teachers Andrew Shearman often said that we should be pouring into at least 2 people.
That is two people you are "mentoring", teaching and equipping to be all that God has called them to be.
It doesn't have to be a formal teaching, mentoring thing just hanging out and showing them Christ in a real world environment and being there when they need you.
For a parent this one is covered, two kids or more and your doing this mentoring thing, you got it down. lol
But for a single girl who often feels she is being poured into rather than pouring into others it's often hard to draw that mental line of being a proverbial gardener and a proverbial garden.
In my heart it's an easy answer. "I am both!"
But my head is another story. My mind has a hard time wrapping around being both a vessel and a pitcher. It seems impossible for my brain to comprehend that I'm being poured into while I pour out.
I'm trying to connect the two but often it's my brain that calls the shots and my heart takes the back seat.

While mulling this over another statement Andrew would often quote came to mind. "Ice cold brain, Red hot heart."
This means we should think things through while living crazy passionate.
Often I feel I've mastered this concept- only I haven't connected the icy brain and the burning heart.
My heart screams out the mysteries of God while my brain just struggles to remember who I really am.
I suppose this part of the asnwer to my original question; When do I stop being the gardener and start being the garden?
When I learn and truly KNOW in both my heart AND my mind that I am both.

Only problem is, this concept is easier said than done.

Shoot for the Moon...

2010-11-10T05:10:00.003+01:00

So it's time to be painfully honest- again.
I'm my own worst enemy.
I've taken all the big moments in my life that have screamed YES to the will of God and shut them down in two words "I'm waiting".
Tonight God asked me; "Waiting on what?"
It seems that this is a lesson I have to continually learn. God didn't create in me a spirit of lack, but of more than I could ever want!!

My whole life I've had big, crazy, abnormal, out of this world dreams and I've lived in a fairy land of these dreams with just me and God. When I went to Spain I shared a lot of these dreams for the first time, and saw them come to life in me for the first time so that other people could see what I was seeing- or I tried to get them to see what I was seeing.
But for some stupid reason when I got home life took it's toll.
I woke up for the first time in my life and realized these big, crazy dreams I'd been living with weren't so apparent to every one else.
I heard; "What are you going to do with your life"
And when I told people my big crazy dreams they responded with: "How are you going to pay the bills?"
So I began to wonder, How am I going to pay the bills?
And the quest for a job became more than just a way to meet my needs but an obsession to survive in this ever worsening economy.
Soon I began to hear "When are you going to school?"
And when I told them I heard "But what if that doesn't work out?"
And I began to panic, what if it doesn't work out? What if I'm not smart enough, not dedicated enough, not this that and the other enough?
For five months I let myself unravel everything that God had built in me for 20 years.
This past week though God began opening doors. Taking little steps very quickly to prove he was working this out his way.

Last month I had two jobs in one week hire out from under me.
But in one week I've had two stores hire me this month.
First it was subway, which isn't my ideal job, but hey it's money and they begged me to work for them.
Then I got a weekend break and went to an art show where I saw my talents recognized for the first time in my life! THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE PEOPLE WANTED MY ART!
When I got home I saw my schedule for Subway, 4 hours, they can only promise me 4 hours a week.
So today when I was taking my sister to work, God provided another job, a coffee shop wants me to come and work for them. The owner wants my ideas, and my talents, he wants my world view and my laid back attitude.

I can see God is speaking to me so much, he's telling me it's okay to dream big again. That life should deflate the big dreams he's given me. I live in his world, a world of big, crazy dreams and if people don't like the answers, they can take it up with him.
As I've said before, I'm living his plan now, so I don't have to worry about what others think.
I'm striving forward, I'm going to reach my dreams, and I'm going to gain great things.
To tell you the truth, the real world sucked, I'd much rather live in the dreams that God has given me.

So I Did This Art SHow

2010-11-07T04:27:00.002+01:00

Last night my sister Morgan and I drove up to Berry College in Rome GA for their yearly art show. This was my first year at their show and my first time ever showing by myself.
I had multiple 8x10 prints, Note Cards, 3x8 Prints/Book Marks and 6 original paintings.
To tell the truth I was very nervous and afraid that I may have brought to much.
The night before Morgan , our friend Amanda along with her friend Dan and my self all went out to dinner, it was great to see Amanda after so long and it really took my mind off the nervousness to be able to just chat for a while.
Afterwards we went to Berry's coffee house and listened to some live music and then back up to Amanda's dorm to fold all the note cards and put them in their shrink wrap.

The nerves didn't set in again until the next morning when I was walking to the Moon Lawn to set up.
I felt so inadequate and I was worried I wasn't going to sell anything.
The morning went on and I hadn't sold anything, a bit depressed; I sat and I sat and I sat.
It was 42 degrees Fahrenheit (which is about 6 degrees Celsius) and as 11am rolled around I couldn't feel my hands or my feet from the cold.
But that's when things started to pick up, a young man came by and wanted to know about the Romania in Red painting, He just fell in love with it, and couldn't stop holding it. When I told him the price he beamed and said "I'll be back, I need to go to an ATM" excitedly he set the painting down and ran towards his car.
Next a couple came by and she wasn't very interested in my art, and he was bored with the jewelry she was looking at. All of a sudden something on my table caught his eye, he picked up the 'Fire in my Soul' painting and commented on the muscle tone actually being accurate. I was so pleased, he quickly bought the painting and showed it to his girlfriend, she stood there mouth agape and then said to me.
"How did you do that? He hates art!" I laughed as he explained he was just picky, but my stuff really spoke to him. He took one of my cards and said he'd keep an eye out for more paintings.
After that things got kind of quiet for a while, I did a quick sketch of a little boy who was enthralled with my art and kept asking if I was a real comic book artist. I told him I was planning on being one and he said. "Can you please make something I can read, I really like your pictures."
It was really one of the best compliments I've ever received.
Shortly after that one of the girls that attends Berry stopped by and also fell in love with the "Romania in Red" painting, though she said she couldn't afford the original she bought a print of it.
About noon Morgan and Amanda returned from buying me a hat and some gloves and getting our lunches. I by this time had to go to the car and sit with the heater on to eat. I couldn't move my fingers and toes and forming R's M's and most words that involved moving your lips. (Which was a big deal because 2 of my paintings were themed off of Romania)
After regaining my humanity and thawing out my blood I returned to the table to see none other the young man from that morning. He was standing money in hand to buy my painting, he was so excited he could barely wait for me to wrap up the painting, but he wanted to make sure it was wrapped so he could protect the paint.
After that it was dead for a while, a lot of people took my business cards.
I sold a few other pieces and I was extremely happy to be able to sell them.

Probably two of my highlight customers of the day though were two older ladies who stopped by the table right before I tore down.
They were so giddy over my art and were quite impressed.
They bought one of my Haa-Chan pictures and likened me to Erte.
They were very fun to chat with and they loved all my work.
Both of them talked about commissioning me for Christmas cards this year which I think will be really fun if it happens.

So I sold a grand total of $109 worth of art, which was very impressive for me who was afraid I wouldn't make anything. After deducting my expenses it came to $85 in profit. I think that was a good turn around.

So I was praying...

2010-10-21T08:55:00.003+02:00

So I was praying and this is what came to me.

"I look out into the endless sea of faces, of brokenness disguised by hate, by rebellion.
I look into this generation who not want to become great. Who wear apathy like a crown and say to those who write histories that we do not want to be remembered because we did not care.
The closer I look the more I see the fatherless, the abandoned the abused all who hide their shame with a mask of 'strength'. Their disguise is thin and never mistaken for the real thing.
As I look out upon this endless sea of a generation I know how Ezekiel felt looking upon the dry bones. I want to hold my hands high and cry "woe to the fatherless generation, who will heal their pain?"
But before I can utter the words I hear the voice of God beside me whisper. "Call them blessed, and call them out."
And so I find MY voice and I say to them:
I call you blessed, oh fatherless generation.
I declair peace over you for the rest of your days.
The Lord God is with you and you are not lost, searching or bound but you are free!
You are no longer a generation of bastards tossed to the wayside to deal with what life has given you, but you are Sons and Daughters of the most high.
(Sons and Daughters are capitalized because they're an identity not a title)
Rise up and be the army of God.
Rise up and claim the inheritance that is yours.
Rise up and know that eternity is written in your hearts and nothing can deny you.
This is the day of your awakening, when you open your eyes and realize your royal duties in the Kingdom of God.
Equip your selves and ready for the fight of your life.
Your destiny is before you and all the humanity you once held dear is coming at you to stop your divine emergence. They may look scary and the battle may be tough but nothing can stop you.
NO WEAPON FORMED AGAINST YOU SHALL PROSPER!
Now rise up oh generation of fathered by the hand of God, rise up and go take back the dominion of your divine right."

Unplanning My Life

2010-10-02T03:20:00.004+02:00

So I feel like I'm in a better place than my last entry.
Not that things are much better, but I'm actually listening for God right now.

Before I had a lot of plans, big plans, plans I've had for a long time. I'm not giving up on those plans, I'm just giving them to God.
When I was 6 years old I had an encounter with God. I felt his hands warm on my back and I felt him whisper into my ears "go to the nations". I saw a white membrane between heaven and my reality punctured and I knew I would never grow up normal.
Since that time I'd been wondering, where do I go? What do I do?
At age 6 I decided to become an Alligator Farmer in deepest darkest Africa... like Egypt. lol I was going to marry my crush at the time and we were going to pastor a church while farming said Alligators.
As I grew up that dream died, and became a joke between my family and I, but the words God spoke to me never left.

At 12 I felt a prick in my heart. Japan. I had no idea what was even needed there, at the time the best I knew of Japan was that it was kind of like China... which was an incorrect assumption.
So I began to plan a mega church that I would pastor in Japan. The whole country would be saved, just wait and see.
But I began to realize church politics and the traditional ministry scene wasn't for me.
But still, God's words never left. Go to the Nations, Go to Japan.

When I was 14 I began to fall in love with Cultures, and Cultural Anthropology was going to be my gig. I was going to travel with Nomads I was going to see the world.
And then I learned of Japan's suicide problem. I also learned the government was hiring cultural anthropologists to come and study the problem.
It felt like all the pieces were fitting in place.
The more I learned of the suicide problem the more of a pull I felt to go there, to be part of righting that wrong. A light started to shine of God's plan.
And then my dangerous, natural tendency kicked in. Just as it had with the Alligator Farm, and the Mega Church, I started planning.

By 17 I had it all figured out, go to Japan work with suicide prevention and in the mean time do ministry. I had a way in, I had a purpose there, and I felt God's peace about that plan.
At 19 I went to Spain and the God dream became a plan.
And the only thing that I didn't have to wake up and tell my self was God in the morning was "work with suicide in Japan".
I was so hell bent on working in Cultural Anthropology I'd never even looked into any other venues to get into Japan. (Aside from Art but there is no money in it.)
I had multiple people give me words (they said were from God) that Cultural Anthropology may not be the way to get into Japan,
And I ignored every one.

At 20, I'm home now. And again I got another word from God, the same one I'd gotten twice before.
"Think other ways besides, church, or cultural anthropology to get into Japan"
The idea of anything other than the life I've planned since I was 14 scares me. But I'm done planning.
THe end result is going to be the same, I'll probably even go to college for humanities and social sciences, but I'm open now to what ever God is saying.
"Here's my plan God, you messed it up, so I'm not going to try and fix it. It's yours, do what you want with it."

So I've been praying, and not planning, and thinking about what God is wanting me to do.
And oddly enough I feel like I'm going to buy a house in the next year.
A very stable move for some one like me who planned a very unstable life.
But I'm moving forward where I feel a peace. And I'm not planning any of it. God is holding the reins now, so I'm sure it's going to a much wilder ride than I could have planned.

I Don't Feel Like Saving the World Right Now...

2010-08-27T05:35:00.004+02:00

Wow, haven't been here for a while.
Don't worry guys I haven't fallen off the band-wagon, I'm still seeking God and walking in his will- as barren and as bleak as it feels, but I'm still here.

When I left Spain I felt like everything was going to come together for me really quickly I was excited and I had a few bucks in the bank, it was like I was taking the first step into my life and I was ready to take it by the reins.
I could almost see my self climbing into a big red old convertible looking over an endless expanse of desert with a here I come world attitude. I had my big sunglasses, my cool high heels and the credits on my movie in Spain were about to roll. Every one left the theater feeling good and talking about how the journey to that scene was.
Now that I'm home I'm realizing the reality of that scene. I climbed into an old car with engine trouble with hardly any money for gas, and now I'm stuck in a hot desert with no rescue. Or so it seems.
I feel lost, out of touch and I'm not sure why.

I've been reaching out to all my new friends, I've been reaching out to old friends and there just isn't any response.
Now don't get me wrong, I haven't been completely shut off I've talked to some people but every has their own stuff going on. It's hard to keep in contact. But it still doesn't end the loneliness.
Then there is the dream, the big picture I've got the map, I've got the image of it, but right now the two just don't add up.
The money isn't there, so I can't take the tests, apply for the schools or even print the information.

I'm stressed, I'm alone and I'm pissed off about it.
This is just a big rant I know, but I need to get it out. I need it to be some where I can look back and say, "hey this next trial is hard but look where I came from then. It got better." And as much as I need to say 'it got better' I need it to get better. Fast.
I need a job.
I need a car.
I need money.
I need companionship.
I need to start school.
I need to start my 501c3.
I need to stop feeling sorry for my self and start moving forward again, get the tears out of my eyes and get the glint that says I can do this back in them.

Some things that stuck out to me from Spain

2010-07-01T22:57:00.001+02:00

I feel like I've had some time to process my time in Spain, and here a few things I really feel like stuck out to me from my time in G42.

G42 – What I learned
• Until you know your loved EVERYTHING else is religion.
• Jesus went into the wilderness FULL of the Spirit, and came out in the POWER of the Spirit.
• God only has one plan. The cross was not a plan B.
• The ONLY THING He is motivated by is love.
• The difference between a Position and an Anointing is a position is man chosen and an anointing is God chosen.
• More people are scared of spiders than death.
• Return to your first love, not your first experience.
• Experience is a good teacher if you’re looking for the knowledge of good and evil. If you learn from experience you’ll only what you’ve always gotten.
• Every revelation from God is an invitation to have an encounter with God. Every revelation that doesn’t result in an encounter becomes religion.
• Paradise isn’t a place where everything works, but a place where nothing works with out God.
• In the Old Covenant the prophet heard God’s voice and went and told the people what he heard, in the New Covenant the prophet hears God’s voice and brings the people so they can hear what he heard.
• Peace is the evidence that you live in God’s house; Grace is the evidence that God lives in your house.
• Every girl should EXPECT God to reach into his quiver and pull out his best arrow for her. Because she is his princess, and no one should deny a daughter her daddy’s best.
• Knowing what HE says about me destroys the lies I say about me.
• God doesn’t want Worship he wants worshipers
• Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it.
• The great decisions in life you’ll probably know I a flash.
• God has given you everything you need some times you just need to dig it up.
• In the Bible we see Man was given a job before he was given a wife.
• Prophetic Worship is one song, many voices.
• God would rather you be an OWNER rather than a renter, SO TAKE DOMINION.
• God is waiting for a man; he won’t have to wait any longer for me.
• Don’t allow anything in your personal history to keep you from going forward.
• God speaks life happens.
• The highest form of communication is the Holy Spirit speaking to the human heart.
• Speak as the oracle of God.
• God’s voice is not an informational voice; it’s a transformational voice.
• Don’t get close to who you really are, GET TO WHO YOU REALLY ARE.

The Church isn’t the Kingdom of God but is only a part of it.
The Church:
• Is militant and victorious. God Never lost and knows what he’s doing.
• Has the keys to the Kingdom.
• Needs to have a binding and loosing ministry
• Is a glorious

I want to be so in the heart of God tha man has to go through God to find me.
-Alexis Black

Who taught you I wasn’t enough?
-God

Last is a Final Word

2010-06-11T15:07:00.005+02:00

Last night was the last Thursday night coffee and game night with the home guys of Fuiengirola.

Thursday nights for the past 6 months have been spent at the Ark Church only 15 minute bus ride down the mountain. From January to yesterday we've gotten to know 7 homeless guys who would come on and off to our Coffee and Game Night.
We've also become very close with the woman behind the homeless ministry at the Ark church Jenny.
Our 8 guys, Sandy, Reggie, Rauly, the Czech twins, Philipe, and Tony all started out as closed up shells. (Well Sandy was very friendly from day one) and grew to be very friendly with us.

Most of our talk was over a game of Scrabble or dominos, while Philipe and Dave (One of the interns who goes down) would play checkers.
We heard countless story after story about family, and past experience before the guys ended up on the street.
One story that has really stood out to me was one I heard last night.

Tony one of the guys who has only been coming for a month or two is an aspiring DJ and is actually pretty good. He takes rock songs and turns them into techno remixes. Though his ability is limited seeing as he has to use a public computer.
Back in England he has/had a daughter who he adores.
The week before last I was doodling on our score paper for Scrabble and Tony came in late.
As the evening went on he noticed the drawings and asked who did them. Lindsay (Another intern who goes down) informed him it was me.
At the end of the night I gave him the paper and Tony was floored that some one would just give him a drawing.
I didn't think much of it because I never really thought much of those sorts of doodles.
This week when I went back we went to go get the tables to set up for the night and Tony pulled out his wallet.
He showed me a picture of his daughter, and beside it was the picture I had drawn.
He informed me that the picture reminded him so much of his daughter, and I have to admit there was a resemblance.
Tony said he'd never loose the picture because he feels like it's a very close drawing to what his daughter would look like now.
I can't believe God was use a silly little doodle like that to minister to a father who can't be with his daughter.

I've been thinking a lot about getting into the Comic industry, and I still want to. But now I know that even if I become a best selling artist it won't mean as much to me as having a picture treasured by a homeless guy in Fuengirolla Spain.

Servanthood

2010-05-17T13:23:00.001+02:00

Servanthood.

“You're here serving, you're not a servant. Serving is the supreme art. God is the first of servants. God serves men, but he's not a servant to men.”
- Life is Beautiful

Upon googling 'servanthood' I found that it is mostly a Christian term. On some blogs it's a term used to describe 'Holy Doormats' who seem to have no other call on their life other than taking direction from the pastor or deacons. Other sources say that servathood is a job left to the elderly of the church who are either to old for ‘real ministry’ or those who have chosen abject poverty for the sake of being a better Christian.
When I looked to the scripture Ro. 15:1 I see a different picture entirely. Servanthood is depicted here as a ‘job’ for the strong. It is a job that requires selflessness and wisdom hardly the picture I was given with the ‘Holy Doormat’ approach.
Philippians 2:4-11 also continues that picture; a servant should be humble, willing to do whatever it will take to please those they’re serving.
1 Peter 5:2-4 then states that those who have humbled them selves as servants will be given the responsibility to take care of others.

Serving (as depicted in class) seems to have a circular effect, first you serve your leader as a follower, and then you serve your followers as a leader and it continues.

We can practice servanthood in every day just by practicing good common sense, asking how some one is doing, cleaning up some one else’s dishes. It shouldn’t be an abstract term that has to be brought to some ones attention.

(I wish) This is Bat Country

2010-05-14T23:27:00.006+02:00

So last Thursday I set off on the trail to Romania.
Well, the trail to Madrid to fly to Romania any way. It was an exciting time of packing, planning and waiting all day until it was time to catch the train to my night bus in Malaga.
Upon catching my night bus I fought back the uneasy feeling in my stomach, the knots that made it feel as if I'd throw up or scream. It wasn't easy and it certainly kept me from sleeping.
So I got to Madrid and walked off the bus and headed towards the Metro where I headed to the Air Port.

I got the air port hassle free and sat down to wait for my 'check in gate' to open.
As I waited I noticed two girls about my age having trouble with their luggage. I got up and helped them over to their check in desk and asked about what they were doing.
They informed me that they were study abroad students and they'd just spent the past five months in Spain. It was their first time traveling alone and they were a bit nervous.
Seeing as I've had some experience with traveling all by my lonesome (as I was about to do then) I gave them a bit of advice and was able to help calm their nerves.
Three hours later I noticed my check in desk was open and I headed over to check it out. Handing the woman my ticket she typed in my information and looked over my passport then noted that I was not buying tickets but trying to check in. Sending me over to another desk I was ready to check in. Beaming with excitement I stepped up and handed the woman my information with a chipper "Good Morning."
She smiled back took my tickets and began to type in all of my information, then I noticed something unexpected- a frown.
With her brows still furrowed she looked up at me and said, "Ma'am, you're not booked for this flight."
As you can imagine I was taken aback, I asked her to look over the confirmation number again and she did only to find that they were not booked.
She politely asked me to wait while she called for her superior.
When the short bald man walked over he typed in my information again and called their information line, he then spotted the problem.
"The website you've booked your tickets through canceled your flight." He informed me. He went on to tell me how that if you don't confirm or mess up a number of your credit card then you only have three days to change it before they cancel the tickets.
I was immediately transported to a few days after I bought my tickets when I received an email asking for my passport number and credit card number, seeing as the email address had nothing to do with the company I bought my tickets through I assumed it was spam. Just to make sure I emailed the airline but they never responded, I then felt assured it was spam.
Now I found I was quite wrong.
The superior from the airline gave me 'i'm so sorry' smile before directing me to the ticket counting saying that I could purchase another ticket to bucharest and see if they'd comp my flight to Timisoara when I got there.
"How much are the tickets I asked?"
"Around 300 euro." He informed me.
I felt crushed. 300 euro? I barely had that much to buy my tickets home, I couldn't just spend that kind of money on the fly. I sighed, about to burst into tears and called my leader at G42.

He told me to pray about it before I came home. So I stood there, shaking at the metro ticket counter talking to God as bought my ticket back to the bus station.
"God," I said. "I feel like such a failure, I should be heading towards my gate right now. But I'm gonna get on the metro and your going to have to speak to me about where I'm supposed to go. When those doors open at each stop I need to know BLATANTLY if I'm supposed to get off there."
So I got on the metro and made the entire circle around Madrid, each time I stopped I asked God; "Is this it?". Each time I felt nothing.
When I got back to the bus station to see if they'd change my tickets from the 16th of May to the 7th later that day I asked God if this was just a big NO to Romania. If I was just stupid and missed the signs before now that said 'don't go'. So I asked God again. "If I'm supposed to go to Romania just give me a sign, am I supposed to go?"
When I cleared the top of the escalators ALL of the ticket windows read "GO TO ROMANIA" Accept the last two which said "Tour Romania" (but I don't have that type of money).
That morning when I got off the bus before I had my big disappointment didn't have any signs on them at all. Only the closed signs, but now they were full of bright attention grabbing signs all reading GO TO ROMANIA.
I really felt like that was my sign(s).

After sending a quick email to contact in Romania from an internet cafe I set off back to Malaga.
Tired, deflated and completely dejected. I had a sign from God but I still felt like a failure, like I was letting every one down.
I sat on the bus and counted down the hours thinking 'now I would be in Bucharest going through immigration' and 'Now I'd be on my flight to Timisoara'. (Just as a side note, don't EVER let your self have a pity party like that it makes a 7 and a half our bus ride seem like a 20 hour bus ride.)

Finally I got back to Malaga. After missing the last train to my city Fuengirola by a few seconds I ran into a woman I'd met in Madrid that morning. Her name was Emma and she was spit fire of a woman, dressed in red from head to toe and sporting a very fun Spanish accent while speaking perfect English.
She remembered me and quickly made sure I got a seat by her on the bus to Fuengirola, I was quite thankful for that too.
As we rode down some younger guys came on board and over heard Emma use my name. They began shouting at me and saying rude things.
Thankfully Emma was very protective. "Don't worry about them she said, just stick with me until your friends arrive to pick you up."
I nodded glad to have some one watching my back.
When the bus arrive back in Fuengirola Emma got off quickly to meet her own friend who was picking her up, the rude guys followed me off the bus closely. When I caught up with Emma her friend came around from behind the car. He was a six foot seven former wrestler, he took me the hands and kissed both of my cheeks (as is custom here in Spain). Thankfully the guys saw this and took off.
Emma smiled, she knew that would happen. They waited for a while with me until the creepy guys were long out of site and then Emma said her good byes to me. Come to find out she was a Christian and she said she'd be praying for me to get to Romania safely.

When I got home, tired and stripped raw of any nerves I checked my email to see if my contact had received my letter.
It turned out she had some problems of her own at the orphanage.
When she'd left that afternoon some contractors were finishing up the kitchen and bathroom remodeling jobs. But in the bathroom they thought they'd hit a pipe when nailing something up. They headed into the room where I would have been staying and took down the wall to see, come to find out when they put the shower and septic tank in the first time the contractors then had nailed the dry wall into the pipes. Since then they'd been flooding their wall with out knowing it every time they turned on the water.
The whole down stairs of the orphanage was torn apart, the kids are having to stay with other people and my contact wouldn't have been able to help me work with the government orphanage because of her own being a wreck.

So through a long day of toil and hardship I learned that God has perfect timing.
He knew the study abroad girls needed some encouragement so He sent me all the way to Madrid to help them with their luggage.
He knew that Emma needed some one to talk to on the bus so He sent me all the way back to Malaga to ride with her.
He knew I needed protection from the creepers so He sent a 6'7" former wrestler to pick up Emma.
He knew that the orphanage wasn't going to work out this week, so He didn't let me get to Romania only to be disappointed.

I still feel that I'm supposed to go to Romania, I just need to find the right timing.

It starts with EZ

2010-04-07T12:53:00.007+02:00

I declare that I will not settle for anything less than my mountain.
Nothing else but the kingdom of God manifesting in my life, on my mountain, in my circumstances will ever be enough for me!
I am a violent woman! I will wreck cities. I'm going to stop asking permission and go out and be VIOLENT!! (For the kingdom of God of course)

Last night I opened my Bible after our evening worship service and just wanted to spend some time with God.
I flipped open to my standard choice of Song of Solomon and began to read, it just wasn't doing it for me.
Which is strange because I've been in this sort of romantic "what will my husband be like" kind of mood lately.
Never the less I closed my bible and turned on some worship music, God had really broken through some barriers in my life during worship.

The Holy Spirit fell on me like it hasn't for a long time, as I began to pray in the spirit I kept hearing my self getting louder, and louder and louder. All I could do was shout to the Lord in words I couldn't understand, my mind totally blank to anything but how awesome he is, how amazingly powerful he is!
It was like a shout of victory, of triumph, I didn't care what people thought about me shouting to God until my voice cracked all I could do was stand ready calling out my cry of "YES GOD I WILL FOLLOW!" (Only not in those words)

So with that bit of back story you can see why the gentle sonnets of Song of Solomon wouldn't sustain me. I asked God, what are you trying to show me RIGHT NOW.
I only got to letters, EZ.
So I began to flip around, flip, flip, flip the first EZ book I got to was Ezra.
"Okay, Ezra, that's good, I can't remember actually ever reading more than a verse or two from there God what are you gonna show me in Ezra." I thought.
But I just flipped, and flipped, and flipped until Ezra was gone and I hadn't been struck by anything. Okay, well, let's flip around some more.
The next EZ book was Ezekiel, I randomly flipped to chapter 2.
"And he said to me, 'Son of man, stand on your feet and I will speak with you'." Well that was a good start, I was asking him to speak to me. "And he spoke to me, the Spirit entered into me and set me on my feet and i heard him speaking to me." Wow, that's even better, God did that during worship.
"And he said to me, 'son of man, I send you t the people of Israel, to a nations of rebels, who have rebelled against me. They and their fathers have transgressed against me to this very day.'" The words began to change as I read them. "Daughter, I send you to the people of Japan, to a nation of people broken because of their rebellion. They rebelled against me and I have broken them, but I will make them whole- and I will make them new."
Now you can see this started to get my attention.
I read on, down to verse 6. "And you, son of man, do not be afraid of them, nor be afraid of their words." "Do not be dismayed by their words or their actions, for they are a rebellious house. And you shall speak my words o them, weather they hear or refuse to hear for they are a rebellious house."
Again the words took another form "Don't be afraid of their words, or be discouraged by their actions, they are a broken people. And you WILL speak MY words regardless of whether they hear or not because I HAVE called you here!"
By this point my heart was racing.
Verse 9 "And when I looked, behold a hand was stretched out to me. and behold a scroll of a book was in it." Down to chapter 3 verse 1 "And he said to me, Son of man, eat whatever you find here. Eat this scroll and go out to speak with the house of Israel."
Once again God spoke to me through this scripture. "I have placed you under these teachings, now take what ever you learn here, take what you learn and fill your self with it, and from there go and speak to the nation I have promised you.

Now that was a lot to take in just in one Chapter. Really it was, I almost shut my Bible then and went to bed, it wouldn't have been bad for me to do that at all, but then I saw verse 17 of Ezekiel chapter 3 "Son of man, I have made you a watchman for the house of Israel." Knowing that Israel was Japan in my life this scripture leapt at me. It tied in perfectly with Joshua 1:6 "Be strong and courageous, for you shall cause this people to inherit the land I swore to their fathers to give them."

Amazed at God's ability to piece things together I began flipping through Ezekiel. Chapter 29 came up, verses 3-6 The prophecy against Egypt. Egypt being spiritual bondage and slavery. God promised to break the chains of spiritual bondage and darkness.
then finally I ended up in Ezekiel 37: 1-14 the valley of the dry bones. God promised to raise up a generation of the dead and dried up and make them fully alive and fully capable or reclaiming their inheritance.

Last nights promises and filling were exciting, and I couldn't help but be in awe of God's majesty and might.

The Thaw

2010-04-04T18:19:00.002+02:00

Easter is today the day of our Lord's resurrection.
Here at G42 we had a city wide Easter egg hunt, It was probably one of the most fun Easter egg hunts I've ever had. except the time I got the egg with $5 in at my grandmothers house. ;D
The thing that makes me happiest about Easter is the spring, the cool breeze, the warm sun and the life that it has breathed back into our hill top city.
The spring term is about to start here in G42 and I honestly can't wait to begin. Two new folks arrived last night (a married couple) and another girl will be coming in tonight. We'll be starting tuesday morning bright and early.
To every one who has supported me; Thank you for helping me here at g42 these past three months. God has done great things in this time and I'm pleased to tell you all that I have some great updates about my time here.
Every Thursday evening I attend a coffee shop for the homeless, one of the guys, a Finnish man by the name of Raully has accepted Jesus as his savior and has begun to share the gospel with his fellow homeless. As well a Scottish gentlemen named Sandy who is an admitted alcoholic is coming off of booze and coming to church on Sundays.
It's amazing to see how God works.

In Mijas with G42 I've been working through two 'English Camps' where we've been teaching the local kids English and sharing the gospel with them. It's great to be part of the community and see the lessons in the Bible really come alive in these kids.

In the next two months I'll be traveling to Romania to work with two orphanages.
As many of you know I want to work in Japan with the victims of 'suicidal tendencies'. Romania and Eastern Europe in general have a similar spiritual climate and I can't wait to go and work with it.
In Romania I'll be staying with an orphanage with well rounded kids and working with one where I'll be hanging out and decipling some young teens who battle with depression.
Keep me in your prayers during that time.

But for now I'm starting the second term, sitting under Andrew, Dave F. and Dave H. is truly an honor and I greatly want to show them and G42 the respect they deserve.
Upon coming to G42 I agreed to pay $1000 a month to cover my cost of living and help towards my practicum. (Working with the homeless and going to Romania)
As of now for April I will need $978, the dead line for having this money in is April 14.
I know that these are trying times for money but there is no better time to give than now.
I'm not asking for a lot, just ten people who would be willing to give $100, or 100 people to give $10.
Thank you guys so much for your support and prayers.

You can donate at this link
http://www.g42leadershipacademy.org/donate

Donate | G42 - the 42nd generation
www.g42leadershipacademy.org
Remember all donations are tax deductible. Also add my name Hannah Day to the the 'note' portion of the paypal gifts

Support update

2010-03-21T16:19:00.001+01:00

Just wanted to give a status update about my support.
Still in need of $150 dollars to complete my time her in g42 this Month. Starting Next month I will need 1000 dollars again before April 14. I know this sounds like a lot but trust me this is good ground.
The lives being touched by G42 Leadership academy are numerous.
Just last month a homeless man was saved and is now decipling his fellow street dwellers.
In May we will be sending out missionaries to Thailand, Romania and many other places.

I only need 12 people to give 100 dollars or 150 people to give ten to be fully covered. Please give, and remember this is good ground to sow into.
Thanks for your gifts and your prayers.
http://www.g42leadershipacademy.org/donate

Remember to add my name on the note section of your 'paypal' gifts. And remember all of your gifts are tax decidable.

Vision Project Video

2010-03-17T12:38:00.000+01:00

Giving Matters

2010-03-01T17:18:00.001+01:00

Remember I'm in need of 1000 dollars this month! You can donate here-
http://www.g42leadershipacademy.org/donate

Things I've learned in Espana

2010-02-28T12:42:00.003+01:00

When I awoke this morning- er... afternoon- I was met with the sound of what seemed like our washing machine bouncing around the laundry room. My eyes shot open realizing my laundry was the last one still in the machine. "Oh no." I muttered quickly making my bed and preparing to go face the worst.
As I was gathering up my toothbrush retainer case and the rest of my morning retinue I realized that accompanying the loud banging of our washing machine was singing... children singing.
It soon struck me that it wasn't the washing machine but drums- It was a parade!!
It struck me then that I've learned a thing or two about living in Spain these past two months, so to help any other struggling new comers to Mijas Pueblo, Espana I've decided to compile a list of things I've learned in Spain- especially Mijas.

-The 6:30 bus can become the 7:00 bus if the driver is hungry enough. Yes, that's right he will go grab something to eat before he comes back to drive you to your destination.
-Learn your Japanese. The only way to really put a dent in the mass of tourist storming your street when all you want to do is get home is to speak their language. At least the standard, "gomen" and "sumimasen" (Not sure if I spelled the second one right in english characters) will usually shock them into getting out of your way.
-Always think about how you want to be immortalized when you leave the house, you can and will end up in some ones travel blog, post card or holiday snap shot slide show, think about how you want to look for the generations that see great grandma's holiday photos to Spain.
-Make sure your camera is CHARGED and at the ready. Impromptu parades happen a lot. Well, at least they seem that way when you don't speak the language.
-Party's happen all the time, always be prepared to be invited- even if your not cool.
-The rain in Spain falls mainly on Mijas- So be prepared for it! Boots, Raincoat, Umbrella, Shower Cap, Change of Clothes, Hair Dryer and fresh socks and shoes should always be ready to be carried where ever your final destination is.

Well that's my survival guide to Espana, at least for right now. Hope it helped you brave tourist- or at least illicit a chuckle from your Hawaiian shirt clad lips.

Vision Article

2010-02-27T14:13:00.003+01:00

Being a Princess

2010-02-21T20:19:00.004+01:00

Before I left home I had the opportunity to apply for the position of princess in the castle in Medieval Times Atlanta.

I really did want that position but I wasn't to sure about it then. I'd have to leave my job at Publix, and I really didn't know how much Medieval Times paid, or if I would even be able to act for the Princess job.

But something in me has changed I think. I really do want that job.

God is showing me more and more that I am his princess! That I shouldn't settle for anything else and that I'm his precious daughter, married to his son.

The princess in Medieval Times is married to the Prince, she may or not have been a princess by birth.

For me I think I'd want to play that part like a real princess, one born and groomed to be in the thrown. I'd want to be dignified, mysterious and gracious.

I'd want to know that I know that if anything would challenge my honor not only my husband would be fighting for me, but our loyal knights and if all of them fell so would the king.

I think I'm understanding more and more what it is to be a princess, and the more I understand the more I want that job.

Please keep me in your prayers about this as a Job when I get back to the states.

Being a Grown Up

2010-02-20T21:35:00.002+01:00

I seriously think I passed my self today while running errands, and I'm not sure I really liked the conversation I had in passing.

I knew when I went to sleep at 3:30 am this morning I was going to regret it. "You'll be running on fumes." I said to myself as I laid down to go to sleep. But I hadn't been tired until 3:30.

At 9am when my alarm went off, I was seriously regretting that move. I laid their until 10:30 and finally got up for the meeting planned for 12:30. I felt so lousy, man I shouldn't have slept in that late. It made me cringe, 10:30? Sleeping in? Boy that was early when I was at home.

After attending to my laundry, making my bed, having a bit of breakfast and cleaning up after myself in the kitchen I headed out for my meeting.

After the meeting I had a short list of errands, and was sure that I was on my way to having a lazy afternoon.

That was not the case.

For a list of Glue Sticks, and Colored Paper it took me four hours and two cities.

I passed the same pub owner painting the same sign three times. It was probably just passed his pub that I passed my self.

"Hannah." I said to myself. Of course I was shocked to see my self. "This is what it means to grow up doesn't?"

"What does?" I said, as I turned my head to watch my self go by.

"Being in a rush and keeping up with responsibilities." I laughed as I went back and forth.

Of course I really didn't pass my self, but I did have an epiphany.

I MISS BEING AN IRRESPONSIBLE KID!!

Ill Fitting Shoes

2010-02-18T11:42:00.003+01:00

I've been here at the Leadership Academy for just over two months now. I'm learning so much, feeling so much and truly becoming equipped and activated.

Recently we were given an assignment called the vision project. In short the project was to take our vision (What we feel God has called us to) put it into two formats, the first an article between 5- 10 pages long with pictures and type settings. The second is a multimedia presentation.

When I began my research for my vision project (of which I will post here soon, don't worry) I was so overwhelmed. The statistics, the facts and the faces of victims of suicide and depression seemed to drown me and I couldn't wade through it. I became physically sick, nauseous to the point of having to stop and intentionally concentrate my entire being on something else.

When I finally got all of my facts done I sat down to write the article it felt like I'd taken on to much.

How can one person, one team, one idea save an entire culture?

In my heart I know that one person (Christ) can, one team (the body of christ) can, one idea (hope) can change a nation, a culture and anything that ever stands in the way of God. But in my head it seems so daunting.

I remember a conversation with God from before I left home. When everything seemed to be upside down in my life and It was almost like I couldn't take any more.

"God! How much more do I have to take to whole!? Are you trying to really kill me? How much do I have die!?" I cried out to him while cleaning a mirror in the downstairs bathroom, amazing how he chooses the funniest of times to talk to you.

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." He replied to me, always so calm. If he was a physical person he'd stress me out with how calm he is.

"How strong do you want to make me?" Of course my language was stronger, angrier but God can take it, he can calm me down, he's calm when I'm not.

"I promised you a nation didn't I?" He finished the conversation with a question. He knew he had promised me a nation, he promised me in his word that the nations would be given to his children. He promised me through his prophets and his promised me in the still whisperings of my heart.

He answered me with a question because the only answer I could give with out lying was "Yes and Amen."

Through the vision project, through the promises and reminders of God I realize I'm taking on a big task, but I'm taking on a blessed one.

Right now it feels like I'm running a marathon in ill fitting shoes, but I'll grow into them.

Support, Plain and Simple

2010-02-11T17:37:00.002+01:00

Here it is folks, I need $450 to for this month here in Spain.

When you really think about it it's not a lot. But I can't do it alone.

If 45 people were to give $10 each that'd cover it! If 5 people gave $100 each I'd be covered into next month.

Just to clear the air, I'm not looking for a free handout. I'm looking for supporters, people who believe in me and what I'm doing.

While in Spain I'm being equipped to go out and create social reform for Japan! This equipping is not just for the future but for now as well. Every Thursday night we drive down to the city below us and run a coffee shop for the homeless.

Last Thursday we heard one man recant his tale of going from being a millionaire to living on the streets with out even one euro to his name all because he was in search of something he never had.

I hope that we can teach him that what- no who he's been searching for (Jesus) was with him all along.

But if G42 can't operate then that ministry goes with out the help it needs to run that coffee shop and then who will share the gospel with this man?

This is just one instance of good that g42 does in this community, but if interns like me can't stay here in Spain then none of that is possible.

Please, just a few dollars can make a big difference.

If you want to donate click the link at the bottom of the page and select intern support.

http://www.g42leadershipacademy.org/donate

I think I'm falling in Love

2010-02-03T17:18:00.002+01:00

Every day on my way to class I pass this house. This gorgeous Spanish house with all the charm and grace of a duchess and all the mystique and magic of C.S. Lewis's Narnian wardrobe.

The front door's window is knocked out, all the windows are cloudy. The garden is over run and from what I hear the second bathroom is on the roof, has no ceiling and no way to drain water off the floor when it rains.

It cost 550,000 Euros. That's roughly 825,000 US dollars. That's right Eight hundred, twenty five, THOUSAND dollars.

I want this house.

Support and Other Matters

2010-02-03T17:16:00.002+01:00

The day has come, February 3rd and the full amount of my support was due yesterday.

God has worked a great miracle in my financial situation in that I have half of this month payed for but I still like five hundred dollars.

Please feel free to give into my account, God will bless any and all seed sown into this ground.

Thank you guys,

Hannah

Another Class project

2010-01-30T00:56:00.001+01:00

Script for Class

January 29, 2010

Excerpt from unfinished novel/book

Chronicles of the Land of Vala: Half-Blood Hero

The story takes place in a land called Vala in which immortals have set them selves up as rulers and gods over the land forsaking the almighty creator.

These gods have overtaken the land and for thousands of years and built their empire on the backs of dutiful worshipers. Only one land was still governed by the free magics of the creator; the High Elf lands, an air borne forest with decedent palaces of marble and crystalline rivers and lakes.

While the long lived High Elves have remained loyal to their sovereignty they began to give refuge to the twin gods of love patron Immortals to the elves, Freyr who sired the Elves of the forest and Freya who birthed the Dark Elves of the mountains.

From this unholy union of gods and High Elves the all father god Odin over took the High Elf lands and made himself the patron of all of the land of Vala.

For the High Elves not all hope was lost, for even though they lived as slaves to the god Odin their Queen the last heir of the royal line survived and escaped to seek the stones of Ragnarok as a way to control the gods and reclaim her thrown.

In this scene we find that Anya is not going about her Queenly duties of restoring her former glory. Instead we find that she has instead taken to helping a human Knight gain glory to be recognized by his own royal father. Anya is traveling back to the bustling human controlled city of Kristok to meet with the Knight Gaiken only for him to meet her in the Neshlaim Plains. After a brief confrontation with the devious Imps of the plain the two have returned to the estate of Gaiken, a placed called Ydalir where they will discuss business.

Dynamics of the scene

· Anya and Gaiken speak briefly over dinner; this scene will show the two in relationship to the staff in Ydalir and in regards to one another.

· Anya and Gaiken retire to Gaiken’s study here the two will talk business.

· Gaiken considers his personal feelings towards Anya.

· Anya’s most recent plan is offered to Gaiken.

The Scene starts with Anya and Gaiken riding through the back gates of Ydalir. The gates are smaller stone gates with twisting iron bars and complex locks. The two ride down the path usually reserved for servants and the camera pans through the fruit trees and orchards of the estate until settle on the back door where the two dismount and the scene begins as an older woman opens the large ornate back doors.

Edith: “The Duke has returned with his prize.”

The woman walks down a few steps and bows gracefully to the two signifying she is a servant in the house.

Edith: “Lady Anya, how happy we are to have you at Ydalir again.”

Anya bows her head in a polite nod and gives a micro-smile to the servant woman.

Anya: “I thank you for your Hospitality Edith.”

Edith: “If there is anything we can get for you please do not hesitate to ask.”

Gaiken moves towards the two women who are now standing in the doorway, stomping the mud from his boots.

Gaiken: “I’m starting to understand how the pecking order has been formed around here, Lady Anya, You and then myself. Am I right Edith?”

The Knight chuckles good humouredly as he walks over the threshold pleased with the amount of mud he’s removed from his boots.

Edith smiles at the two and pats Gaiken on the shoulder.

Edith: “My lord Duke, you’ve always been last in line when it came to getting your way in this house, you’ve nothing to worry about.”

Edith chuckles along with Gaiken before ushering them out of the corridor and into the kitchens.

Edith: “Dinner is nearly on the table, so, hurry and clean your selves up.”

The scene changes to dinner that night. Anya and Gaiken have changed into more comfortable clothes and the setting is more relaxed, the two have finished the first course of the meal and are being served the second.

Gaiken: “Tell me lady Anya, where did you travel to this time?”

Anya: “I have gone to the Liniek River, to the city of Gjoll.” “There I have spoken to the human Von, he has told me of whispers of the creatures of Grimlash.”

A servant girl begins to serve the two a plate of sweet meats and vegetables.

Gaiken: “The traitors to the crown? What of these Grimlash?”

Gaiken looks troubled. The over all feeling of the mood is changed to a darker more sinister tone.

Anya: “Now is not the time to speak of such a dreadful people.”

Anya begins to cut her meat unaffected by the mood change; she has remained stoic the entire meal.

Gaiken: “And when shall be the time?”

Anya watches the servants leave making sure their out of earshot before speaking again.

Anya: When you retire for the evening, invite me to your library.”

Gaiken gives Anya a puzzled look wary of her mistrust in his staff.

The two have known each other long enough that he continues eating normally after a moment then continues with normal conversation.

The scene again changes to after dinner in Gaiken’s library. This setting is darker lit by the glowing fire and is accented by shades of deep amber and red. Anya is inspecting the antique books before they settle down to talking business. Her countenance is softer in private and her mannerisms are still just as regal as before.

Anya: “How old are these?”

Gaiken: “Close to eighty or so by now.”

Gaiken begins to tap down the tobacco in his pipe.

Gaiken: “Does that seem young to you Lady Elf?”

Anya is now in position under a painting of Gaiken’s mother, her pose is similar to that of the woman hanging on the wall and Gaiken gives her a compassionate look.

Anya: “They are not so terribly young, such works do not last long even among the elves.”

Anya takes the book she was inspecting from the shelf and walks towards Gaiken, taking a moment to inspect his affectionate gaze at her.

Gaiken opens his mouth to speak before Anya settles on a footstool before him but a maid comes in with a tray and two glasses of brandy interrupting his confession of feelings.

Anya stiffens, unsure of the other and waiting for the young maid to leave. When she does Anya opens the book to a map of the lands of Vala. She does not give time for Gaiken to finish his thought before she dives into the plan.

Anya: “Nishk Braisk. A struggling city of outcasts and plagued ones, home to the Grimlash, the vile group of betrayers.”

Gaiken nods waving one had as if to signal her to continue her thought.

Anya: “The son of King Geirrod has planned an attack against his father.” “Von of whom I spoke with has told me the prince who was banished to Nishk Braisk now seeks his fathers thrown.”

Anya reaches for her glass of brandy and takes a sip, studying the map a moment as she does so.

Anya: “On the night that the nine moons vanish from the sky he’ll make his attack.” “But he won’t be alone, for on the night of the eclipse the band of Nishk Braisk are allowed to leave their city, and as a hired band they follow the prince.”

Gaiken sighs. He exhales the smoke from his pipe and then looks down at the map.

Gaiken: “King Geirrod is the king of Barish Tar, being so far away from both cities I dare not think your suggesting we stop him.”

Anya nods.

Anya: “We are a days ride to Barish Tar, and we have the advantage of being along the only road from the way of Nishk Braisk.” “We can cut him off from this position and you will gain the glory of defeating the usurper in battle.”

Gaiken nods, and chews on the end of his pipe.

Gaiken: “And what of these hired hands you mentioned?”

Anya: “Von, of whom I spoke with, and myself will have elements to deal with these traitors.”

Gaiken looks resigned to Anya’s plan for glory and sighs giving her a look of devotion.

Gaiken: “Then I shall lead us to battle.”

I Have Not Seen Greater Faith

2010-01-23T10:46:00.008+01:00

Matthew 8:10 When Jesus heard it, He marveled, and said to those who followed, Assuredly, I say to you, I have not found such great faith, not even in Israel!”

"People think we have such great faith going out and doing these things for God's kingdom and ministering to people, but really we can't do it with out their support. I think it's them who has the greater faith, because even though their not physically there, through every time they give their believing with us for what we're doing."

- Becky Miller

I just thought I'd post a little encouraging story about a little girl here in Mijas called Emma.

Emma and her family have dinner with us a lot, and Emma is a very cool girl.

Emma writes songs, very spiritual songs, Emma worships like an adult, if not more freely, Emma is also a giver, like no giver I've ever met.

The air port lost one of the girls in my house's bag a few weeks ago. She wears a size 3 or 4 in children's shoes. So you can imagine how hard it is for her to find shoes for herself in a foreign country.

I'm not sure if Emma bought the shoes or brought them but she gave the girl from my house a pair of shoes.

They didn't quite fit, but it's the thought that counts right?

I'm amazed at the faith Emma has to give things like this so freely.

I my self have always loved giving, but I want to be like Emma where I give out of an innocent heart always.

It's amazing what little things can do to bless some ones heart, and it's even more amazing how God can ues even a little girl like Emma.

My prayer is that the world can learn to give like Emma.

Another project from Class

2010-01-21T13:56:00.003+01:00

God’s Revelation, God’s Vision, and Me

What is God’s Vision in my life?

To see Social Reform in Japan, and see their ‘cultural’ depression lifted.

Japan has been in an economic depression since the early 2000’s, many people have begun to believe that this is the cause for Japan’s rising suicide rate.

Statistics say that in Japan, since 2003, the rates of those who have killed them selves have become a major population deterrent.

Last year alone more than 100,000 men and women over the age of 60 killed them selves, like wise children 19 years of age and high school level suicide rates have jumped 25% and Middle School to primary School children leaped 60% more from their already record high level of 6^th in the world. (According to 2008 census.)

Pairing this fact with a 35 year declining birthrate from abortion as an acceptable form of birth control, sexually inactive married couples and a drop in fertility in women ages 25- 35 we can easily see that there is a problem.

Social science, economic stimulus and even political pleading has been in place since 1997 but still the number of Japanese citizens dwindle each year and now Japan is considered to be a waning nation.

Ever since I was twelve years old I have had a burden for the Japanese people, through years my fire may have been quieted from zealous studying to determined research of the problems and problem solvers in Japan, yet I continue to feel burdened for the waning culture. My dream is to complete the proper schooling as a Cultural Anthropologist; using this medium I can build a team of like-minded rock breakers to go into Japan and begin to uncover this spirit of social and cultural depression. As a Cultural Anthropologist I would have access to government information, government contacts, Psychologist research and other highly trained, highly qualified like-minded team members to help in this endeavor.

Now that we’ve heard the vision let’s talk some about the goals.

For this project I’ve been asked to set up three 3-week goals, three 3-month goals, and three 3-year goals.

Three-Week Goals:

· Begin courses in learning Japanese. (Retrieve Pimslur Japanese mp3’s from home)

· Research Work/School Visa’s for Japan.

· Research current ministries in Japan to partner with.

Three-Month Goals:

· Begin planning proposals for funding and support in this project.

· Learn at least 300 Japanese (useful to conversation) words

· Begin searching for supporters.

Three-Year Goals:

· Have Started Cultural Anthropology schooling. (Unless God otherwise leads for another route)

· Begin looking a place to live in Japan

· Have learned conversational Japanese and have learned to read enough to not get lost.

· To have contacts in Japan ready to start this ministry.

The heart and soul of every team, organization and even individual drives are Core Values.

For this project I’ll be listing several core values I will try to live my life by as well as measure my team by.

· A heart that listens for the direction of God.

· Integrity

· Excellence in ALL that we do.

· A servant’s heart for people, and a heart that wants to see lives changed.

In having a vision one needs to be able to communicate this vision to their supporters.

The old saying goes that money makes the world go around and God is able to provide people that want to give the revolutionary green.

In my life I’ve seen God supernaturally bring in money, and I’ve seen him honor those who gave supernaturally out of their limited funds. Seed, Time and Harvest are important keys to giving in God’s kingdom, and no one wants to sew (donate) their seed (Money) into questionable ground.

In Communicating with my supporters will be a large portion of getting this ministry started.

Media and spoken word will probably be the most effective ways of communication with supporters state side, and even in Europe and Asia.

I believe through positive media and testimony we can also achieve a good deal of support from Asia and Japan it self.

As well as donations I would like to create specialty products with a logo or picture about our cause. These products would not only fund this ministry but also raise awareness and be a form of communication themselves.

In my personal contacts as of this moment I would be able to print T-shirts, wristbands, hats, bags and order specialty made Capos (a musical device used to change the bridge on a guitar). Objects with our logo could be sold in stores in my state, and in music stores internationally.

Now that we’ve talked a little about the supporters and how to reach them, I should probably go into a little detail about them.

Supporters are not always those who fund this ministry. Some are financial, while others are prayer partners, accountability partners, people who offer guidance and those who are there for personal support.

Through media, positive actions and testimonies I hope to reach:

· Business owners who believe in my cause and are willing to help raise awareness and funds for this vision by hopefully offering products that the profits or a present of the profits will be donated to this social reformation.

· Local Churches that wish to support us through prayers, gifts and even manpower.

· Mentors and family who would like to be there for Personal Support, Guidance and again financial support if they are lead.

· A team who will serve with me and offer accountability to our mission statement, core values and choices.

Now that we’ve talked a little bit of whom the supporters are let’s talk about who the team will consist of.

Our cause will be a large one, and is a subject that as of late has become something of a cultural acceptance. For our team we will need people of influence as well as people in positions to reach the every day man and woman.

In my belief the people best suited for these jobs would be:

· Teachers in the local school systems

· People in government positions

· People who share this vision and are willing to hang in for the long haul.

· Ministers who are willing to disciple the people.

· Businessmen and women who are willing to support, and out reach using their influence over their work force (a large portion of the potential people who will commit suicide.)

While having a team and supporters are amazing with out a target audience there is no reason to walk around with such an entourage.

My target audience would be the Japanese. With a goal of social and cultural reformation like this one changes rarely take place over night. It will require constant communication through media, actions, spoken word and even just being there for a person who feels there is no hope left. Communicating with my target audience will be a challenge especially because Japan is so over stimulated by media, movies, music, and even just the advertisements as they walk down the street.

While I would hope to use some media in gaining support for our cause I feel that actions, personal interaction and positive works may speak louder than words.

Even with a game plan mostly set there are still some holes in my skill set.

Some of these holes include:

· Education, Seeing as I am very young it will be very hard for me to get a Japanese visa with out an education or with out being in an occupation for at least 10 years.

· For this the only way to for me to fill this gap will be for me to either work a job for 10 years or finish at least 4 years of schooling.

· Finances; as I’ve mentioned above, nothing in life is free. So it’s quite obvious that cash is going to be a bit of a gap in my skill set. Not just having it, but making it has never been my strong point either.

· Another ‘short coming’ I feel that I have is a boldness or natural talent for group speaking, or promotion.

To solve both of these problems I would hope to partner with business owners and fellow ministers that have been supporters in my ministry thus far. I feel that through learning to promote my cause and learn ways to create awareness I can better raise support and create a ‘campaign’ (so to speak) that could help further our cause and bring light to this bleak cause.

At A Loss

2010-01-19T12:28:00.002+01:00

Today I feel in a productive mood. I feel that I need to get all of the jumbled up words in side of me out into a orderly blog. But when I sit down and put my fingers to the keys my mind enters a state of wordlessness that wont connect my brain to my fingers.

I suppose I want to write a bit about what I've been learning here in Spain, also I would like to write asking for support, and maybe even about my own personal feelings. Some how each subject either has more cons than pros, or it refuses to fill up more than a paragraph.

For what I'm learning in Spain, I'd love to write several blogs, but my thoughts must be ordered a bit more before I really write anything.

As for asking about support I simply ask that you give. The first of February and I simply can't do this on my own again. God wants to use the seed (money) that you (the supporter) has to grow something in my life so that you can reap a harvest.

I ask that we honor God's laws of Seed, Time, and Harvest as well as Honoring G42 and the land lord here in Spain by giving on time.

As for my personal feelings, well I really don't feel like every one needs to know about them. There personal. I really can't due anything to change the problem that is vexing me from the states, so I'll pray about it, talk with my 'Big Sister' Shanda and go on. Try to live with palms open giving my problems to God.

In my mind I still have a few choice 'un-christianly' words for the problem maker.

That's just a brief of what I'm feeling. Please continue to support me here in Spain. Expect some blogs on my vision for my future ministry and again on some about what I've been learning here.

In the words of Tiny Tim: "Living in the sun light loving in the moonlight having a wonderful time-".... (wrong Tiny Tim)(lame attempt at humor ignore)

"God bless us every one"

I've climbed the mountain and I looked around

2010-01-15T23:48:00.004+01:00

Today, I climbed a mountain.

It was my first hike ever, and It was more than a mile up of strenuous rocky trail.

At first I wasn't planning on going, but I was talked into it by one of my house mates and well by God I was determined. (Not really, I just didn't wanna hang around the house by my self until they came back with their stories of how awesome it was.)

So at 2 o'clock this afternoon we set off, up the street across the road and to the quaint trail that was just a little bit hilly. This is nice, I kept thinking, day dreaming all the while of stories I could be writing when I got back down.

Half way to the first plateau I was knackered out. Tired as everything and wheezing for breath.

"How far is it?" I kept asking, by this time only thirty minutes had passed.

We continued our ascent up, up up, up, up and up some more, then after that we went up again, and then up once more just for good measure.

Less than a third of the way up I was having to forcibly move my legs to keep going.

It was a constant battle of wills, my bodies will to shut down and my own pride to keep me going to the top.

For the first time in my life I was having to really really really work for something.

Not that I hadn't really strove to do things before, but this was so draining and I wanted so badly to give up every step of the way, but I needed to get to the top, I had to.

So I went on, realizing this is the part that people leave out when they talk about 'valleys' and 'mountains' in their spiritual lives.

Most people just want to ride the gondola up to the top of the mountain from their toils in the valley, but it's only really worth seeing if you have to will your way up.

Tomorrow is going to hurt like nothing I've ever felt before, but I'm gonna move my legs forward again, fighting for every inch of ground I take, because I've taken the mountain, and even if I have to stubbornly move forward to get to where I'm going, I'm going to get there.

That's the lesson I really felt I learned from climbing the mountain today. Not that I was out of shape, which I learned that too, but that I have to really want something so badly I won't give up for it.

Span-Dangler and the Power Outage

2010-01-13T22:15:00.001+01:00

Johnny Span-dangler

In a blink and an anticlimactic flash the power went out.

With cries of ‘oh no’ one of the boys (Chris) headed out in the street to check and see if the power was out all over the street or if it was just our house.

Here a short middle age man and his dog met him.

This man proceeded to talk to Chris in Spanish for five minutes, each time the conversation held even a fraction of a pause Chris tried to interject that he didn’t understand English still the man persisted. Thinking quickly Chris called Becky, our resident Spanish major. After less than a minute of conversation Becky realizes this man doesn’t understand much Spanish.

“Habla ingles?” Beck asks and the man pauses for less than a beat.

“Oy, Yes, my name is Johnny Span-dangler!”

By this point we’ve all crowded around the door.

“Where are you from?” Asked Shanda, another of my housemates.

“Northern England, Newcastle to be exact.” Mr. Span-dangler replied.

He went on to tell us about how the owner of our house also owns his, our next-door neighbors and two or three others up the street. He said that often the houses owned by the landlord often loose power for no reason and some one usually calls and they get the power fixed, not to worry.

“How long?” Becky asked, referring to the power.

Span-dangler didn’t miss a beat. “That’s a very personal question to be asking a man, now isn’t it?”

At this point we nearly died, do we laugh, was he serious?

While we fought to keep straight faces he continued. “I’ve been married three times, and each time it gets shorter.”

“I mean the power.” Beck said, trying her hardest not to laugh.

Well we finally figured out that power would be off for an hour or two and it was no need to worry, but through this conversation Mr. Span-dangler offered us wine and weed no fewer than three times.

He also mentioned he was a chef before he retired, cooking Indonesian and Thai food.

“When it gets warmer,” He said. “We have BBQs out on the room terrace, not the grill, high class such I mean, all international, we invite the whole neighbor hood, me and my wife do.”

“Really?” Chris said, humoring him a bit.

“Oh yeah, and your all invited, being new to the street and all, even the land lord will be there.”

And so it was settled we got to know our new neighbor and were invited over for a drink any time.

As soon as we shut the door we died laughing, we laughed, and laughed until our sides were sore.

When we finished laughing Becky went outside to make sure the power in our shared-power neighbors was on yet, a man came up and began chatting away with her.

“Oy.” He said with a wave of his hand. “Your power out too.”

“Yeah.” Becky replied standing in our door.

“Well if ya get cold feels free to pop ‘round to our door we got a nice fire going. You can have a glass of wine and all with us.”

“Thank you.” Becky and I said together in an appeasing tone.

For a moment this forty-something year old Englishman, who introduced himself as Glen, told us about how he used to be a policemen working in forensics and now he works as a ‘unofficial chauffeur’, ‘taxi driver’ and about anything ‘un-legal car related’ he could make some money off of.

Becky and I laughed.

“Do you know Johnny Span-dangler?” Becky asked.

“Oh yeah, I live with him, we’re good friends.”

Becky and I tried our hardest not to laugh.

“Well I’m off to go get some fire wood, see you in a bit”

A bit later we were all in the dining room laughing when we saw Glen walking back up the street with an entire wooden sign from the construction site at the bottom of our street as his fire wood.

So tonight was an interesting time of meeting our new neighbors and decided weather or not to attend Johnny’s BBQ in the summer.

For a chance at more laughs, I think the answer will most decidedly be yes. (Don’t worry family, all the guys are dying to go to.)

A project from class

2010-01-12T22:47:00.001+01:00

What is the Origin of Evil and Did God Create it?

From what I have learned and prayed about I feel that nothing is out side of God, he is eternal and the creator of all things.

The Bible many times sites that he is the author and finisher, the beginning and the end, the creator of ALL things. Because we believe that God is the creator of all things we must accept that there are no strings attached to the word ALL.

In John 1:3 he states that "Through him all things were made; with out him nothing was made that has been made."

If we accept that is the ultimate force in t he universe then we must accept that nothing can rival him. In turn agreeing to that point means that 'evil' is not his arch rival like some comic book story.

In Colossians 1:17 it says that "He is before all things, and in him all things hold together."

THis must mean that all concepts are held together by God and are not an issue for him.

As for when evil was created it is a bit trickier, it could be said that it was when Lucifer fell, or when Adam and Eve first sinned.

FOr me it isn't in such 'time line perfect' categories.

I feel it may have been created when the fear of loosing the eternal became more important than the Eternal (God).

In Short if we believe that the bible is true, and that "God is before all things, and by him all things consist (There is no no angel, principality or power that exists with out him)" then we accept that there is no other logical explanation about the origin of Evil other than to say God Created it.

That also means that is has a purpose in Gods plan, to bring glory to his name (plan).

Say Amen and Make a Plan

2010-01-12T15:54:00.000+01:00

God,

I thank you for your plan in my life. I thank you for the promises you've given me and I will seek your time frame for my life and I will not stray from it.

Give me strength to follow through with your promises and a heart to weight the direction your leading me in.

Amen

Dear friends, family and suppoters

2010-01-10T16:37:00.000+01:00

I just wanted to let you all know I've been at the beach today, watching a baptism in the cold and the wind and the rain, we went into a pub for tea and then returned home.

.... I can see my breath as I sit in my room and write this.

I just felt you all should know this.

While I'm seeing signs and wonders, you have heat, and I'm not sure which one is better at this moment.... and that is sad.

Pray for supernatural warmth.

We're not called to be Cinderella

2010-01-09T02:09:00.000+01:00

I guess this is just a quick blog to kind of remind my self where I am in the eyes of God.

Because I've always known God loves me, and that he's wooing me into his perfect love, but some times the focus is a little skewed.

For many of us we believe that we're all servants in the eyes of God, meek timid little girl who sings that one day her prince will come and deliver her from her life of cleaning up filth off of the floor. That before Jesus comes and sweeps us off our feet and takes us into his perfect place that we're just servants.

But thats' not true.

What I've come to believe in my walk with God is that we're called to be Sleeping Beauty. A firey princess with a big heart for adventure and bursting with a readiness to get out and discover her own royal heritage.

Of course most of us don't know we're princess, after all we've been raised to believe we're just poor country girls, yet we still go through the grooming and the courses to become a princess even if we don't know that's what its for.

Then some day, the prince arrives, Jesus who is so captured with our regal presence that he can't help but desire that we come into the fullness of Queenship as his wife.

This was just a quick blog to remind me to also be an Aurora not a Cinderella.

(If you've not seen the Disney movies Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella, it may be time to rent them.)

Economics 101

2010-01-07T00:15:00.001+01:00

Support would greatly be appreciated.

You don't know how tempted I am to leave this entry at that simple phrase. It would allow me to keep my pride and not feel as if I were begging for money, and it would probably be easier for most people to ignore.

But pride goeth before the fall and while ignorance is bliss knowledge is power, so I'm going to lay out the facts for you all.

I need $1000 at the beginning of each month. Yes that's right ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS! 1-0-0-0.

That seems like a lot doesn't it? Well let's convert that over to Euro.

Right now the Euro is something like 1.45 to every 1 dollar. Let's just round that up to 1.50 for easier division.

1000÷ 1.50 is 666 euros.

Now let's factor in, food for the week is pulled from ten of us to eat off of for 6 days. That's

666-25= 641. Now let's take away my board, that's close to 100, that's euros now, not dollars.

So we now have 541, now let's put in for the cost of tuition, which would include lights, rent, heat, at 493.39 and then a salary for Andrew, (the man who runs the school) who hasn't drawn salary for over two years on the school, that's 47.61. Now remember all of that is in euro NOT dollars. That 1000 dollars doesn't seem like so much now does it, and it doesn't stretch very far either.

I hate to be frank, but those are the numbers.

Thank you all for being so supportive and giving while I was on my way over but now is the time I need you most, because I want to honor what I'm being taught here. I want to make sure my tuition is payed on time, so that I don't disrupt the order of these economics. I want to honor my teachers and my class mates by being productive in class and on time for classes, so why shouldn't It be she same for my tuition?

As always your prayers and gifts are lead of God and work so many wonders in my life and the lives of others. Please continue to support and I pray that you are all blessed a thousand times in return. (You can do the math on that one.)

You can give at:

Family Ministries

P.O.Box 602

Hoschton GA

30548

or follow the instructions on the G42 website.

http://www.g42leadershipacademy.org/donate

Thank you guys again,

Hannah

Official Day 2

2010-01-04T16:15:00.000+01:00

Happy New Years from Mijas Spain!!

Classes start the 5th tomorrow, and I'm excited to start.

So far the week hasn't been to eventful.

Just exploring the city and playing cards.

The first day was pretty eventful, walking on the beach in Fuinerola(sp?) and eating lunch out.

But seeing as I was unprepared for needing a towel we had to drop in at Dunes.

So we went into Dunes to get them and when we got out I went to ask about the bus.

Dad came over to go check and see what was taking me so long and forgot the towels on the bench we'd been sitting on.

When we got back the towels were gone! Stolen! (dramatic ohno)

We had 15 minutes before the bus arrived and had to go buy more towels.

All and all they worked out okay, excepted the black lint the towels left after you dried off with them.

Well today was mostly card playing since it rained.

The Road to Spain

2009-12-21T07:03:00.000+01:00

So it's 1:04pm eastern time. My hair is wet, my clothes are not packed and I'm leaving in the morning to go to south GA for a short Christmas with my fathers parents.

It's in moments like these I realize I'm ill prepared for the long trip ahead.

For the next six months I'm going to be living in a Christian community in Spain. As excited as I am, I'm completely nervous.

I haven't raised my funds entirely, I've not even begun to pack, and I am still lacking a few items from the 'please bring' list.

A bundle of nerves knots in my stomach as I prepare to live away from home for the first time.

But I know that where I am weak God is strong.

In this first step on my journey, I am prepared to walk in faith and expect God will provide.